What's On Our Fairly Simple Baby Registry — and What Isn't
This past week, I hit the 6-month mark in my pregnancy. Each milestone feels extremely relieving and exciting — as we become that much closer to meeting our baby boy in June. And yet, since day one, I’ve been the most overwhelmed by one thing — and no, it’s not the actual process of giving birth. It’s our dang registry.
While we are trying to stay as minimalist as possible when we have a baby, we also acknowledge that there are several things we will actually need. Plus, similar to when you get married, a registry provides a rare opportunity to get some higher-quality items you might not otherwise splurge on — or in my case, get some new things when my first instinct is usually to scour Facebook Marketplace and my local thrift store for secondhand goods.
So I fully realize that this is a balancing act — of cutting back in the areas we can but also fully embracing certain devices and products that will probably make our lives a little easier, even though some might consider them frivolous or unnecessary. There’s no perfect solution or one-size-fits-all model.
In fact, I asked my Instagram followers a question a few weeks ago and got an overwhelming response; it seems I tapped into a topic many are extremely passionate about! I asked “What is one thing (or several things) you think we don’t need to buy for the baby?” It was fascinating to see the results, as opinions differed drastically. And aside from the what-not-to-buy list I was able to create, I learned some very important overarching lessons from experienced moms — and dads!
In asking that question and reviewing the responses, I learned:
Avoid single-use items. Try to find things you can use in multiple different situations. For example, I registered for this cover, which functions as a cover for nursing, car seats, high chairs, shopping cars, and swings. I also chose this bathtub because it can grow with our baby from 0-18 months and has a temperature gauge built in so we don’t have to buy that separately.
Wait to see what your specific baby will actually like. This was mentioned specifically for bottles, pacifiers, and swings, as many said their baby despised a certain brand and their next baby absolutely loved it. To help with this, I registered for this bottle box and this pacifier box, so we can try out different ones before committing to a certain brand. Plus, we were gifted two different types of swings and bassinets, so we may hang onto both before deciding which one stays!
You can always order something later if needed. Fortunately (and unfortunately), we live in a world of instant gratification and same-day shipping. So if you end up needing something you didn’t expect to need or didn’t know you needed, you can usually have it shipped to your front door or pick it up from a nearby store in a matter of hours.
Don’t get too much of anything. Sometimes, we think we’ll need 10 sets of crib sheets or 40 bottles, when a handful of each would do just fine. We are starting out with two sets of crib sheets, as usually you can have one set on the crib and one in the wash at any given time. And for bottles, a friend of mine who just became a mom said they have used just ONE bottle for their newborn, simply rinsing it out after each use. For some reason, I had imagined having an army of bottles, so this was very surprising and reassuring to me. On the flip side of this advice: many have warned us we will need lots and lots of burp rags and zippered onesies, as there is so much poop and spit-up, especially in the early days. So we are stocking up on both!
Practicality/function > cuteness/aesthetics. This one is big for me. I can get stuck on what is cute and aesthetically pleasing, even if it’s the most impractical thing. Moms who have been in the trenches have warned me that it’s not always glamorous and picture-perfect — and sometimes, your kid wants the light-up Paw Patrol shoes you despise. So this same thing applies to baby products: many people mentioned super dressy or formal baby clothes are impractical, as their baby lived in basic onesies and sometimes just a diaper in the early days. And sometimes, the neon green pacifier is the only thing that will satisfy your screaming newborn in the restaurant.
We’ve over-complicated things with gadgets when there’s usually an “old fashioned” way that works just fine. Some of the most common responses (listed below) are high-tech gadgets that didn’t exist 20 or 30 years ago. Usually, there’s a more analog alternative that achieves the same result, such as running your baby bottles through the dishwasher (although that’s not necessarily “old fashioned”) instead of having a sanitizer that takes up half your counter. Funnily enough, we went ahead and registered for the top product mentioned: a diaper pail (but it’s the Ubbi, which doesn’t require any special bags!). For our specific circumstances, we value the convenience of having a dedicated place to contain all diapers and their smells (especially because we have a dog who likes to activate the motion sensor on our kitchen trash can). Which leads me to the last point…
Everyone’s preferences and opinions are sooooo different. When I was looking through the responses, it was like whiplash: one person would say something is a MUST, and the next person would say that same item is absolutely trash. Due to varying lifestyles, experiences and opinions, people will give you all sorts of different answers, whether you’re asking about their must-have items or must-not-have items. What matters is simply taking in that information, considering it, and then making your own decision — and then once the baby is actually here, you’ll inevitably form your own conclusion about what did or didn’t work (see point #2). We’re all just doing our best and making it up as we go!
I received more than 100 responses and while there were certainly some one-offs, there were definitely many similarities in the answers of what-not-to-buy. Here are the most common responses, with the first two being the most agreed-upon by far (with nearly 20 people in agreement)!
What-Not-to-Buy for Your Baby
According to My Instagram Followers
Wipe Warmer
Diaper Pail / Diaper Genie
Bottle Warmer
Baby Towels / Washcloths
Bottle Sanitizer
Snuggle Me Organic or Dock-a-Tot
Baby Swing
Baby Shoes
Baby Bathtub
Swings, Bouncers, Table, Seats (Pick One)
Expensive Baby Changing Pad
Baby Clothes
Any Other Swaddle Besides the Miracle Swaddle / Too Many Swaddles
A Bunch of Newborn and 0-3 Months Clothing
Hatch Noise Machine / Noise Machine
As mentioned, I have several of these items on our registry or already given to us, including a diaper pail, a Dock-a-Tot (gifted), a baby swing (gifted), a baby bathtub, baby clothes, and a sound machine. After much thought and discussion with other moms, these conveniences feel important to me — at least from my current perspective. And the rest of the things on the list aren’t on there!
But what is on our registry? Instead of listing everything out (and inevitably having to update it as we make changes in the weeks ahead), I thought I would link to it if you’re curious or in the process of building your own. So here it is! I definitely pulled up several of my friends’ registries when building ours — for inspiration and a reminder that yes, I will want nipple butter…
Please know I am NOT linking the registry so you will buy anything off this list. We have experienced incredible generosity already — in the form of secondhand items passed down and gifts already purchased off the registry. Our friends and family have supported us and loved us so well, in all forms.
I would much rather direct you to support an organization like RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association, which believes everyone deserves the right of family. We feel incredibly privileged and thankful to have been able to receive infertility treatment in the form of IVF, and fully realize this is not accessible or even an option for many. And it should be. As we’ve seen in the news lately, many barriers still exist that make the dream of family just that — a dream — and not a reality. Since 1974, RESOLVE has worked to remove those barriers by providing access to care, advocacy for coverage, access to support and community, access to education, and awareness of all family building options. You can support those efforts by donating to RESOLVE here.
There you have it! That is our very-much-work-in-progress baby registry that we spent a lot of time and energy creating, with the ultimate goal of bringing an appropriate amount of gear into our small-ish home. And we won’t get it perfectly! But thankfully, Baby Rags won’t notice or care.